Chapter 104 - Holding On?

"I don't give a shit what you have to do, I need you to find her and I need you to do it quick." he yells into the phone, once again wishing he could slam it down.  

"Jon, I've looked everywhere.  She has not popped up on anyone's radar since last Monday.  Almost two weeks ago."  says the loyal investigator that he's hired numerous times over the years.  

"Keep looking.  She's one woman, can she really be that hard to find?  No credit card usage or nothing?"  he asks, pissed off that he isn't getting what he wants, when he wants it.  

"Nothing man, I'm telling ya - she doesn't want to be found."

It was then that it dawned on Jon, when she goes on vacation she only uses cash.  How could he have forgotten that.  "Check the Bahama's, check Hawaii, check warm sunny places - she's on a vacation."

"How do you know?"

"She never uses credit cards when she leaves the country, it cash only."

"And you think she's someplace tropical?"

"Yes.  Keep me posted."  Smart phones take away the power trip of hanging up now days.  When you have to press or swipe to hang up, it loses the effect when you're mad.

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Beth was back in California, the place that she felt like herself, she wasn't identified through Jon out there.  She found herself a nice ocean front condo and bought a few furnishing and wanted to get on with her life.  Her life without Jon, her life without the kids, her life without all the heartache.  She knows in her heart of hearts that Jon was right.  It was true, they were in one crisis after another and they never were able to move forward.  Losing McKenna at the hands of a woman that they let into their lives plagued both of them with guilt.   She avoided all communication that he tried to have with her.  She thought, what more is there to talk about.  He ended the relationship and that was it.  She was blind sided by it and finally accepted it. 

It was the night of the Grammy's and they all were on the list as being there.  Beth waited for months to attend and she wasn't going to let a break up stop her from going.  Over the years, Beth has gotten to know many people in the industry and she was going to support them.  She plans on arriving early to change the seating plan, she didn't want to sit by the family.  Jon can handle is own kids.  This is what he wanted.

She dressed in the gown that she bought with Stephanie, added some gorgeous jewelry and looked breathtaking.  When she was finished, she waited for the car service to pick her up.

She arrives at the theater where they were being held, walked the red carpet and as she moved toward the door, she heard a reporter ask her, "Why did you not arrive with you family?"  She stopped dead in her tracks and asked, "What did you say?"

"Jon, Dorothea and the kids are here.  Why did you not arrive with them?"  She dismisses what the reporter asked her and moves on along the red carpet.  Once she's inside, she find the MOD and explains the situation.  They were able to move her away from the gang, and they sat her next to Kid Rock.  She smiled and thought the night might be fun after all.  She sat in her seat and waited, she was 2 rows behind the Bongiovi's and she hopes that they don't see her.  But Stephanie does.  She turns around and waves to Beth.  Jon sees that and turns to see who his daughter is waving to.  When he sees it's Beth, he can't help himself.  He gets up and goes to her.  Kid sees him coming and intercept with niceties and finally sits down.

"Can I talk to you?" Jon asks her, under his breath.

"We don't have anything more to say, which is even more painfully obvious, since Dorothea is here.  I hope that you two can make it work.  Please go back to your seat."  She says to Jon, not making any contact.

"Please, let's go out side and talk for a minute."

"NO, Jon." she snaps at him.  "You gave all of that up when you dumped me over the phone."  she has small tears filling her eyes, "Please leave me alone.  Go back to your family."

"Beth...."

"Jon, I'm done.  I won't bother you, I am letting you go to do whatever you want to do.  From the looks of things, Dorothea seems to be the only one happy."

"Beth, I just need a few minutes."

"I said no." she turns her attention to all of the guests around her, ignoring Jon.  He finally gets sick of being rejected and goes back to his seat.  Several times over the night, she could see the Bongiovi's looking back at her and when she seen the kids doing it, she would either smile or wink.  She would never ignore the kids, they had nothing to do with the mess that was going on - well, the mess that is now over. 

The Grammy's were great.  Beth had a great night sitting with Kid Rock and loved mingling with many celebrities at the after party.  She didn't stay long because she could only handle being glared at for so long.  She gave Dot a look that said you win.

It took a few minutes longer than normal for coat check to get her jacket.  As she stood there looking through the texts and emails on her phone, she was startled by someone touching her shoulder.  She looks up and it's Dorothea that's standing there.  "What do you want?" she asks her ex boyfriends wife.

"Why did you come here?  Were you hoping to see Jon?" Dorothea snaps at her.

"Listen Dorothea, I'm here because I was invited to be here.  I came here hoping that Jon wouldn't come, not only that, but I have many friends in this room."

"They were our friends first."

Beth reaches for her coat, from the coat check girl, hands her a tip and says, "Thank you."  Sliding her jacket on, Beth looks to Dot, "Go be with your husband.  You have exactly what you wanted."  She turns to leave, hoping that was the last time that she will ever have to see that woman again.  

Beth drives home, with her heart in her stomach, feeling like she has suffered yet another loss.  She keeps telling herself as she listens to 'their' song on repeat this is what he wanted.  He's broke it off with you and is now with Dorothea.  The Grammy's were supposed to be our night.  Our night to show the world that we made it through the most unimaginable and are stronger than ever.  The Grammy's was their night to show the world their love and their unity.

She wondered how many laughed at her, laughed at them.  

She said GOODBYE.